The Consequences Of An Ingenious Plan.

Like a 10 year old giggling with anticipation my daughter the Lovely Seven of Nine, someone who hasn’t seen 10 in over twelve years, called last night announcing they had declared tomorrow a snow day. I have to admit I was hoping for a solid performance from the weather G-ds as well. I woke this morning to about 10″ of snow at the house, the streets were not too bad, but I think the 10 year old in me took over when I set off to work. About 15 minutes from the house I was able to convince myself that it wasn’t worth it. So here I am making a mid-morning post.

Snow Day!

It’s ironic that when I’m not out making money, I always seem to find ways to spend it. I was thinking a little later today I might talk my wife into a quick round of What The Hell Is That? Not, What The Hell Are You Going To Do With That! It’s, What The Hell Is That, the one where we go to The ARC Thrift Store. Although….

About a week ago, in an attempted to stop that annoying 3:00 a.m. bedroom door scratch and potty call by Hazel the dog, I came up with a plan that would have made Wile E. Coyote proud, it was simple yet ingenious. I put up our old ACME Baby Gate (I told you he’d be proud), one of the few left overs from an earlier life. We have a simple floor plan to our house, in order to create an acoustical buffer zone I placed the security gate mid-way down the hall leading to the master bed room.

Today I’m walking with a temporary limp. Who knew that it could be that dark at 5:00 in the morning. Unwittingly I shuffled right into the lattice structure, of wood, plastic, and steel hardware. How I didn’t end up flat on my face is a wonder, the thermostat on the wall, the one I grabbed on to in a feeble attempt to catch myself, the one with the mercury bulb in it? Yeah that one, well it was old anyway.  Along with the thermostat, I seem to have removed a dime sized patch of skin from the bottom of my big toe, so for the next week or so, I will limp along, with visions of sock fuzz stuck to the bottom of my big toe.

What really galls me is that once I regained my balance and found the light switch, Hazel the dog lifts her head from her peaceful slumber on the couch and looks at me as if to say, “Hey Buddy, we’re trying to sleep here, do mind keeping it down? Stupid dog!

Talk to you later.

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“An Artic Express”, With A Hint Of “Up Slope”

The weather has taken this opportunity to reminded the people of Denver that although it may be spring, winter can still strike the Rockies well into May. The ranchers and farmers welcome  the moisture and I enjoyed the early out from work, the two hour drive home I could have done without. Right now the dogs are driving me crazy running in and out of the house, reminding me of little children with a winters worth of pent up energy.  

Lily, enjoying the snow.

Lily and Hazel, seem to get recharged when ever we get any kind of snow. They ask to be let out side every three minutes, attempting to chase down the squirrels. It appears to be some sort of elaborate game they play, which would come to a tragic end if either of those two dogs managed to catch one of those rats with fluffy tails.

 Hazel the smaller of the two, has a killer instinct and on more than one occasion has sampled birds, mice, and a young squirrel for lunch. Served with a nice Chianti I hear they are quite delicious.   Lily the larger of the two out weighs Hazel by about 60 pounds but is about as timid as a mouse, afraid of her own shadow. She is also a bit neurotic, for about three months straight she chewed on one of her toes. We tried about everything known to man and dog to treat it but she would not stop. It  got so bad that eventually we had to have the toe surgically removed. I know it sounds a bit rough but  the chewing has stopped and she seems much happier.

The schools are closed, the city seems to be in lock down and I think we got a total of 5 inches. The winds are what were causing the most concern blowing at about 15-20 miles per hour. That and the fact they never got the plows out! I still think they have overreacted. Denverites have several different names describing the weather phenomena responsible for our snow storms. The larger the snow fall the better the name. Buffalo, New York has their “Lake Affect Snow”. But try to top names like  “The Artic Express” and “Up Slope” with my favorite  “An Albuquerque Low.” Denver traditionally has never been very good with large amounts of snow fall. When the snow fall starts hitting 8 – 10 inches the city goes into panic mode. Natives blame it on too many people from Southern California or Texas, who don’t know how to drive in the snow. In part that is true, but the bigger problem is a city government that never gets the snow plows out in time to get ahead of the deepening  accumulations. Denver mayoral races have been won and lost over how well the incumbent handled the “blizzard of the century.” The year my wife and I were married December 1982,  Denver was hit by a truely large snow storm. The day before we were to be married Denver received about 26 inches of snow. The mayor’s solution to this crisis was to use garbage trucks to pack down the snow on the side streets. For weeks people were trying to navigate through 12 inch deep ice ruts, destroying wheel alignments and tie rods, even riping out the occasional oil pan. The joke around Denver was that mayor later became transportation secretary for the Clinton administration and the country.

So tomorrow maybe a bust depending what the snow depth is heading north. If the plows get out tonight it won’t be too bad. Be safe.

Talk to you later.

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